More pictures by Emma

A perfect late summer afternoon~

Nora has a new little brother...Cooper.

Umm, yes we decided that the best thing to do after bringing home a 11 month old baby is to adopt a rescue dog...I will leave the rest of the story for later...

I am missing Seoul.

The past couple of days I have been reflecting on our trip to Seoul, perhaps it is because tomorrow will be three weeks since we brought Nora home, it is hard to believe. Our time in Seoul went by so quickly...I was so anxious to return home with Nora, I missed my boys and my family and needed to feel whole again. However, this week I miss the little things, the green tea ice cream that was heavenly on an incredibly hot day, browsing at all the wondeful, beautiful cakes that were truly a work of art...the happy smiling Buddha...and the beautiful brushes hanging in the window of the Name Chop store where we bought Nora's name chop.

Nora had a rough night tonight trying to fall asleep, perhaps she is missing her Seoul too, her Omma and Appa, her special routine that she had before going to bed, the smell of her Omma's hair next to hers, her Appa's smile when he walked through the door...so many things that I will never know for sure. The best I can do is just be there for her...tonight she struggled to relax and close her eyes, she was pushing me away but then would quickly look back to see that I was there for her. She feel asleep after many verses of Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star..perhaps she feels the need to feel whole again as well, maybe the sound of my voice helped her to sleep, I hope so. Our daughter will always miss a part of Seoul, no matter how old she gets or where life takes her, she will someday feel the need to go reconnect with that part of her life...I cannot wait to walk beside her...and share a green tea ice cream.

K

Just love that little pout...

Just another day at the Kutscher house...yes, we have a new family member...Cooper, a rescue dog from North Carolina.

why not.

K

This smile got me through a cold, rainy day.

She loves her big brother Owen...

This is one of Nora and Owen's favorite games to play...he closes the basement door and she taps on the window for him...lots of giggles. I am not sure how long she will find this game amusing once she realizes that all of the best remotes, phones, computer cords, dvd players etc. are in the basement, there is so much more chewing that she is missing out on!! Owen is really a great babysitter, he loves taking care of her and she loves to give him big kisses (sometimes disguised as biting his nose, but we are working on that one!). I am so happy that Nora is going to have three older siblings to help guide her through life in the Kutscher house, she is going to know all the tricks by the time she is old enough to get away with them. Emma, Owen and Declan love her and protect her so much already, Nora will never want for hugs from them.

K

Family.

I remember taking this picture this past Christmas when everyone was gathered at our home to celebrate the holidays...looking back I had no idea that we would be waiting another 7 months before we met Nora, at that point we didn't even know who our baby would be...I am so thankful for my family, for their unconditional love and support of us throughout this adoption process. Nora has joined our family and in so many ways it feels like she has always been here, she was just waiting for the right time to join us. This Christmas she will be part of our family photo, she has already been in my heart since I started this journey close to two years ago..the difference is now I can share her with the most special people in my life, my parents, sisters, nephews and niece...the people that are the fabric of my life and now will forever be a part of Nora's as well.

So many people have said to us how lucky Nora is to be joining our family...I feel that I am the lucky one, I have been given the gift to parent again, to love a child that was placed in my heart by a strong, brave woman who made a difficult decision almost one year ago...Nora will be celebrating her first birthday in one month but I have been given the best gift of all...family.

K

Over Jet Lag

Yesterday, was the day that we are officaly suppposed to be over jet lag.
Thats good, I was going to write a long post but I have to go.
We are going to see Dragon Boat Races.
Don't get too excited, I'll have a blast.
LOve
EMma

Saturday mornings in the grass...

It feels good to be home...

Finally starting to feel like a family of six...school shopping today with all four and gramma!
Nora ate out with us for the first time tonight, she did really well considering she was very tired...
Life is about to get very busy, hold on!!

Kelly

Curious Nora..she did start off the day with a shirt.

Declan is a officially a 49'er..

Declan has played flag football for three years but his first love has always been tackle football and now he is old enough to play!
He has had two practices and is already planning on being a running back, he claims he is the fastest on the team...I hope he has a great season and is able to find his equipment on game days...the football helmet should be easy to find, it's on his bedpost. I think if he could sleep with it he would.

K

Not sure what day it is... I think it's thursday.

I know, that title is pathetic but it's how I am feeling lately...things are going well, I think. Nora is smiling more and showing us her true personality. Her foster mom told us she has a hot temper and she does...she will certainly let you know when she is not happy! Nora is exploring the house more and more and loves to look out the door and watch the kids outside and the cars go by, she is going to be hard to keep up with when she begins to walk. I have been putting her in her crib to sleep at night and so far we have a pretty good track record, not great but I will take the wins when I can get them.

Tonite we went out for ice cream and on the way home in the car she held my hand with both of her hands the whole way home. I know that might not seem like a huge deal to many but for me it felt amazing, she was so peaceful just sitting there looking at me and holding my hands, I felt like we had a major breakthrough as far as her attaching to me and it felt great! I'm not sure I truly felt like I was her mom until I was able to soothe and comfort her which is what moms do best and we are on that road...so life is good!! I know that Nora was meant to be ours, she is really finding her place in our family and fitting in so perfectly...

Today Emma said to me that she missed Seoul and a part of me does miss being there...the Korean people were so kind to us and to Nora. I hope that we can travel back to Seoul someday as a family so Nora can see where she was born and meet her loving foster parents, that would make this journey feel complete in so many ways.

Here's to a peaceful nights sleep for all of the Kutschers so tomorrow I know what day it is...

K

More Nora pics...

We are not the napping house...

I have decided that although Nora requires a nap she just doesn't want to give in...I get 30 minutes at the most and then she is standing up in her crib crying...not ready to let her cry it out yet...so, we are not getting a whole lot accomplished here at our house...pajamas have become the favorite wardrobe, I am hoping things get better when the kids head back to school and we can work on more of a schedule.

Nora is def. attaching to me which is wonderful, much better this week compared to when we first got home. She will crawl and follow me around the house and at times say "mama" when she wants to be picked up. Nora still cries out for her foster mother at night which breaks me heart each time she does it, I can only imagine how scary night time must be for her, I am sure that was her time of peace and comfort with her foster mother. Nora falls asleep after her bottle and likes to be right on top of me, which of course feels great when you can finally feel their little bodies relax.

The kids have been wonderful with her since we have gotten home. Owen is very much in love with his little sister and every opportunity he gets he is willing to help me out with a walk in the stoller or entertaining her in the car. I am always amazed at how well they have adjusted to all of this change in their lives. Last night we had dinner around our table and it was so good to have all six of us finally together after waiting so long for Nora to be a part of our lives.

I am going to head out with all four now for school supplies...wish me luck!!
K

The many faces of Nora

Korea pics...

I am crossing my fingers that we have turned a corner...

Today has been a much better day for Nora and Mom...I think after being up for two straight nights she is realizing that I really am okay, I don't want to jinx myself too much. Nora went to the Dr. yesterday and she has an ear infection which is not helping the transiton but in some ways it has forced us to spend alot of bonding time together. She is eating really well and loving being outside with the kids, as long as she is moving she is a happy girl. As I type she is taking her 2nd nap in her crib which is a HUGE accomplishment, just MAYBE tonight I can sleep in my own bed.

It is so good to be home with our family, I do not regret traveling to get Nora but it was a wonderful feeling to land at JFK. I look at her and wonder what is going on in her heart and mind...she has been through so much in just five days, more than you can put into words. The moment her foster parents walked through the door and into the waiting room at Holt I instantly had tears in my eyes, you could tell how very much they loved Eun-seo and how difficult it would be for them to say goodbye to her. The foster mom placed her in my arms outside Holt and I gave her a hug and tried my best to tell her Thank you in Korean...I'm not sure words were needed, we both knew what was in our hearts and I knew the heartache she must be feeling...I glanced over my shoulder one last time and the social worker from Holt was comforting her as they walked back into the building, I am sure it was a sleepless night for both the foster mom and dad. As wonderful as adoption is it is not without much loss, for everyone involved...I am so very happy to have Nora and feel like we have been given an amazing opportunity in life. I hope Nora will feel our love more and more each day...

K

A few days home and things are getting a bit easier..

More pics of our trip and coming home...